Valentines, What is Love?

Well a lot has happened since I last posted. Mainly I've been very busy with university work,
however today I had 2 nice surprises. First of all my morning lecture was cancelled due to my lecturer being ill, I hope she recovers soon as it's not like her to take a day off. The second if getting my first ever Valentines card through the post. Yes thats right in the 21 years I've been on this planet I've finally got one, and it actually kind of scared me yet made me smile. (Mainly because I have no idea who its from, and it was posted so said person has my address.... still to work out who its from..).

But anyways, because it is Valentines Day, I thought I'd looking into the side of what love actually is. I'm going to link this into my usual topics of course and look at something which has become a modern issue in the modern world and that is relationships and children.

There are many relationships in the world, from marriage, to civil partnerships to just simple living together. First of all, just to make it crystal clear before I continue. I have no issue with any type of relationship whatsoever. I am not biased towards any particular relationship. However when it comes to children at home I do strongly believe that a relationship between two parents is needed. Children from families that do not have parents who love each other or love them do not fare well in their life.

For example it can be complicated when children are involved in a divorce. It is even worse when their parents don't get on and constantly argue. I know from personal experience that this never fares well and that it can lead to big complications in any child's holistic and social development. When one parents tells a child one thing and the other parents tells the child the opposite it is confusing and can often be hard for the child to determine which is right. I found it hard which side to side with as a child. I never knew if I should do what my father said, or do what my mother said. When I was younger my parents didn't speak after their divorce, and as far as I ama ware they still do not speak now. Most of the vital communication and issues were relayed through my grandparents as they were 'neutral ground' and I often felt like I was shunted between parents like a railway truck that needed putting into a siding on a night.

But anyways, the one thing I just wanted to outline in this entry is that no matter if you are a single parents, married, divorced or living with your boyfriend or girlfriend. The children you have or may have are important and they need love to cherish and prosper. Ensure that you know that you love them no matter what and even if their mummy or daddy leaves, that they still love them and its not their fault. There are a lot of children out there who's parents divorce and they think that its their fault that one of their parents have left. This can make any child feel lonely and shatter their self-esteem. The truth is, it is never their fault. Relationships can sometimes fail, but if there are children you should always lets them know that both parents love them unconditionally and regardless of any circumstances.

Also, if a relationship does breakdown or fail and custody of children is divided in any way or precentage then it is vital that the parents or guardians of the child co-operate with each other. There has been many cases that I've seen and heard about where the child has no idea whether mummy or daddy is picking them up from school and they have no idea which house they are going home to. Remember that schools, nurseries and after-school clubs are not there to act as a 'hand over' service to your ex partner. Also when it comes to the child's health, well-being and even parents evenings. Go together and act civil. Just because you broke up doesn't mean you are worst enemies. Parents with children who are no longer together should come together when their child needs them to be and be the parents you should be.

To sum it up, to all parents out there. Let your children know you love them, in your own way. Even if those children are from a previous relationship and be a decent human being. Don't let them see you argue or bicker with your ex-partner and when they need you be there and show the love you have for them.

Happy Valentines Day.